The Damn OS
by TheOneThatStayed
Summary: Fargo has to come fix the computer system, while emotions are still high from the Artie situation.
1. Chapter 1

"No no no NO, This can't be happening today" Claudia moaned leaning over the main console in the office. Today was the day that the agents were supposed to meet the new Artie and new Leena and the computer system had just locked her out for no reason. "Okay if that's how you want to play then, I'll get my head in the game."

"Claude, are you talking to the computer?" Jinks had just entered with Trailer moping behind him.

"Yes, how else am I supposed to get her to unveil the secrets as to why she is locking me out? Did you recheck the Dark Vault's lock?" She said typing in what looked like a random order.

Steve crossed over to the chair next to the console and sat down. "Yes Claude and I made sure the aisles she'd be going down today were all acting like they should. You need to calm down it will go fine."

She slapped the side of the computer and then shrieked. "Dammit, why do we even need a new Artie? Ours is just a little dinged, he's not broken. And now the system is shutting me out and ugh." Claudia slumped down on the chair and ended up rolling 2 feet away.

"Are you sure you can't fix this, I mean its computer stuff right?" He turns around to see a glare aimed at his back. "Or, not."

"It has stuff to do with the OS, I have very little wiggle room with our OS, since it was made to be unhackable, and if I hack it I'll mess up the entire system which would really just aggravate the whole situation." Leaning back she closes her eyes.

"Can you get IT out here then?" She opened one of her eyes.

"What did you say Shirley?"

"Are you our IT guy, because if you can't mess the OS thing then that probably wouldn't be the best idea." Claudia pushes herself out of her chair.

"Good problem solving there poopypants" She leaned over him grabbed her phone and walked out into the warehouse.


	2. Chapter 2

_Meanwhile in Eureka_

"Jo, did you get the reports from Mansfield yet?" Fargo was striding down the hall way finally getting ahold of the life asshole Fargo had made for himself.

"Fargo, I'm not your assistant…"

_*Cell phone ringing*_

Grabbing his phone from his pocket "You kind of are."

"Dr. Douglas Fargo…Oh hey… yeah what's up… " Stammering he started walking faster in some attempt to create space between himself and Lupo.

"Fargo, who are you talking to?"

"Shhhh. What… oh no it's not you…I was talking to Jo, um no it's quiet around here, well relatively, for Eureka I mean." He started getting flustered, scratching at his neck.

"Don't Shh me Fargo" Jo was ready to slap her boss.

"Yeah I can catch the next flight…No it's no problem. Yeah see you soon. Bye." Shoving his phone back into his pocket, and readjusting his suit, Fargo turned around to face Lupo.

"Fargo you look like a school girl who just talked to her crush." Jo was now smirking figuring out who it must have been on the phone.

"I do not and She needs help with the operating system I installed for them, so it was normal a sto why she called me."

"Ooh who is **she **Fargo?" Sheriff Carter managed to slip in behind Jo with Allison behind him.

"The child that was our **special V.I.P**." Lupo taunted

"Claudia is **not **a child" Fargo started getting flustered now.

"Jo, be nice. I think she was very bright, and she did help out with the trees." Allison spoke up in the ridiculous conversation.

"Thank you. Now I need to go and pack." Fargo starts walking away before he turned around. "Hey Lupo?"

"I'll book you a flight to South Dakota."

"Thank you"

Carter turned to smirk at Jo.

"What?"

"You are so Fargo's assistant."


	3. Chapter 3

"Pete, what's Claudia doing?" Myka stands on the balcony looking in at Claudia talking to the mirror while she was fixing her hair.

"Huh." Crossing his arms he turned his head to the side.

"She took her phone and ran off into the warehouse. She was trying to fix something on the computer." Jinks came walking up the stairs, before leaning against the railing.

"Computer? Oh that's why" Myka grinned at Pete before walking into the office.

"Wait what does she mean? Who did Claudia call?" Steve pushed himself off of the railing.

"Oh ho ho, Claudia getting something tonight." Pete followed Myka through the door.

"Can no one in this place answer a question when it's asked?" Jinks looked at the ceiling before stalking through the door.

Claudia stopped talking when she heard the door open. She patted her hair down one more time before facing the others.

"Oh hey guys what's up?" Myka, Pete and Steve formed a semi-circle around her.

"Not much, I hear we're having a special guest." Myka smiled knowingly at her.

"Yep, you know our new boss is coming." She turned around to grab her phone from the table which had just vibrated. Staring down at her phone she smiled as she texted back a quick reply.

"Claude, I think you know who were talking about." They had gotten closer to her.

Claudia turned around. "That has some scary implications."

"Okay, I'm lost so if someone wants to inform me on what's going on, I'd greatly appreciate it."

Pete turned to Steve and smiled. "Oh my dear Jinksy, our lovely Claudia here has a suitor, with the name of Fargo. He is our computer nerd tech guy. And that is who she is primping for."

Claudia started to blush. "He is not **courting **me, we're just friends. And I am NOT primping."

"Oh that was a lie. So why haven't I ever met this guy?" Steve looked at Claude who was purposely staring at her feet

"Why would you need to? You know what this is ridiculous and he'll be here soon so drop it." She pushes through the other agents' semi-circle and moves over to the door by the umbilicus.

Steve turned to Pete. "Is this guy good for Claudia?"

"Yeah, a little goofy and awkward but Claudia seems to like him, even if she denies it." They both turn to the front as Claudia stands up.

"Ok he's here to fix the OS so don't bother him."

Pete steps forward to wrap his arm around Claudia's shoulder. "Where do you get the idea we'd be bothersome to you two love birds?"

She pushes his arm off her shoulder. "Pete, please don't."

_*Take my love and take my land and take me where I cannot stand, I don't care I'm so fr….*_

"Hey, yeah I'll come right out." She walks out into the umbilicus and shuts the door as the rest of the agents look at each other then follow after her. They open the door to hear Claudia.

"Dougie!" She runs up to a guy not much older than her, wearing an ill-fitting suit, and hugs him.

Returning the hug, he breathes in. "Hey Claude."


	4. Chapter 4

"Hey there Fargo, how's it goin" Fargo looks up from the screen Claudia had him sit at. It was Pete and the somewhat terrifying new guy.

"Oh hey Pete, uh I don't think I know your name. I'm Dr. Douglas Fargo, but you can call me Fargo." He held his hand out to Jinks. He looked Fargo up and down, not quite understanding the attraction.

Finally he smiled. "Agent Steve Jinks, ATF."

"Pete, come over here we need you to move this over to the Aisle XXZJT." Myka beckoned from across the room.

"Why, we have the forklift don't we? That means one of you could do it" He whined

Claudia popped her head in from the records alcove. "One, it's broken and I haven't had time to fix it yet and Two, how is the forklift supposed to get up the stairs. Now go."

"Fine. " Fargo turns back to the screen and starts typing.

"So Fargo" Steve stares expectantly at the man at the computer. "What is going on with you and Claudia? Do you have any plans for the future?"

"Well…um not at the moment…I"

"OH MY GOD JINKSY, I thought I'd have to yell at Pete but you too? Go and do something far away in the warehouse." Claudia started pushing Jinks away from Fargo and to the warehouse door. Shoving him out of the door she shut and leaned against it. "Sorry about that, he thinks he needs to have background information on everyone I talk to. And everything is already hectic around here." She said giving him a small smile.

He turns back to the computer, "Just normal warehouse stuff or…" Crossing to the chair next to him she collapses down into it.

"No, not really, we're meeting our new Artie today." He turns to look at her.

"New Artie? Did the old one break?" He said laughing.

"Actually yes he did." He stopped and turned to her.

"So I'm going to not take this as he is a robot and wait for an explanation." He smiled at her.

"Well it's going to be a long story, but since you aren't any farther than I got on the OS I guess we have time. Ok well the warehouse got blown up, and Jinksy had already died and then when the warehouse blew up Mrs. F died and so did HG and then Pandora's Box got blown up and so did hope and everything got really bad and I was suffocating and Pete was dead and Myka was running from the law and so Artie used Magellan's Astrolabe and turned back time to save everyone and we did get saved and obviously the warehouse didn't get blown up but when he used the astrolabe he created an evil and we thought it was this catholic priest because that's what Artie said he saw, but actually this guy was all in Artie's head and Joshua almost died and Leena did die and so now the regents are trying to get our Artie back because now it seems like the evil Adrian side is taking over and so he is kinda broken but not really, and so now we're getting a new boss which is ridiculous because I've been trying to run us and it isn't like we've made the warehouse implode yet and if they're finding a replacement Artie then he isn't getting better. I mean that's how the regents work. And now the OS has locked me out and I just don't know what to do anymore." Her hands are the only thing holding her head up. Fargo wheels his chair closer to Claudia's.

"Well that explains why there has been no random outburst of North Dakota's capitol since I've been here." Claudia stared at him blankly. "Ok, so way too soon for jokes. Listen Claude I was pushed in to my job, kind of suddenly and I had a lot of growing up to do in an incredibly short amount of time."

"Oh when you went back to 1947?" His jaw dropped to the floor.

"How… how did you know about that?" She smirked.  
"Dude, Max Wertheimer's Zoetrope I saw your entire life flash before my eyes and there was a definite shift between nerd no one listened to and boss man. Also the plane and the mine field were pretty good clues." Doug was entirely flustered.

"Well no one is supposed to know about that and anyways that was not the ending to my pep talk."

"My bad" Her smile made him relax a little bit.

"What I was saying is I was pushed into this job and I had to figure out the ropes as I went along, I was able to swim and so will you."

"Thanks Dougie. Well I'll let you finish, well start and Trailer can keep you company. I have to go prep some rooms at the B&B." She got off her chair, and patted Doug on the shoulder, before walking out into the imbilicus.

His heart sped up at her touch. "Wait who is Trailer?" Answering his question a white and brown dog curled up at his feet and went to sleep.


End file.
